Order of work

wrinklet1 · Post by **wrinklet1** » 08 Oct 2003, 15:26

What is the the best way of starting a job on a Citroen? De-Caff coffee, or normal coffee? Drip feed or not, tube may get in way! Or is it a promise of a cold Theakstons Old Peculiar waiting for you when you finish?

AndersDK · Post by **AndersDK** » 08 Oct 2003, 17:03

Definately drip feed normal coffee.
While-u-wait for the coffee - you prepare your pipe with a mild tobacco - thinking about the job ahead.
Equipped with pipe in mouth & coffee in one hand - you slowly & thoughtfully heads towards your Citroen - and start the work with a gentle & friendly pat on the roof.

VisaGTi16v · Post by **VisaGTi16v** » 08 Oct 2003, 18:37

I think a few quick pints of lager helps otherwise you end up going insane trying to work out why on earth Citroen put things in certain places/held them together in that way etc

JohnD · Post by **JohnD** » 08 Oct 2003, 18:59

Yea! why did they put it there? I set out to change the coolant in my 2.1 Xantia yesterday. In the two years since I last did it, I'd forgotten that the radiator drain screw was situated right in front of the aircon compressor, making it impossible to take hold of the tap. Mind you! when I'd finished the job, I moved on to the 1.5D Saxo to give that the same treatment. On that, they don't fit a drain plug. It's off with the hoses.

NiSk · Post by **NiSk** » 08 Oct 2003, 21:33

I've tried feeding my XM with both lager and coffee before doing any work on it, and all I get is a silly grin!
//NiSk
p.s. hav'nt tried tobacco yet though . . .

Homer · Post by **Homer** » 09 Oct 2003, 01:11

I find it helps to do all the swearing and cursing up front and get it out of the way so you can concentrate better.

Stuart McB · Post by **Stuart McB** » 09 Oct 2003, 01:15

I find it' aways good to start by asking the wife if she needs the car that day and if she can find her way to suppling a constant stream of full caffine strength coffee for multiple hours.

BonceChops · Post by **BonceChops** » 09 Oct 2003, 01:31

Even better if the wife does need the car for the day [:D]

wrinklet1 · Post by **wrinklet1** » 09 Oct 2003, 14:54

I thought of giving my Xantia red bull, maybe it'll get wings?

wrinklet1 · Post by **wrinklet1** » 11 Oct 2003, 19:02

Why,when you are in the mosr awkward position does your wife bring out a cuppa? and then you fprget about it until she asks 2 hours later if you had drunk it??

wrinklet1 · Post by **wrinklet1** » 11 Oct 2003, 19:04

Or, when she has brought you a drink out (especially in winter),and you have drunk it, you get back under the car, twisted to the left, right leg up and around to right and both arms twisted over the sub frame, do you then find out that you need a pee???

paranoid · Post by **paranoid** » 06 Aug 2005, 06:41

WAs taught a good way recently by a lad who's into motorbikes.....
4 cans of red bull, and your buzzing undoing things in a twirl of spanners and ratchets, before you realise it everythings in bits.
It works a treat can dump the oil+filter, fuel and air filter and have the front wheels off in about twenty minutes[:)]
Don't suppose it's very healthy though[:I]

PeterMann · Post by **PeterMann** » 06 Aug 2005, 10:09

Definitely need altered consciousness to repair Citroens ... it's a matter of reformulating the mind into the chinese-puzzle consciousness from which it was originally conceived. Sort of like the mechanic's eqivalent of shamanism. Helps if you can also do miracles.

jeremy · Post by **jeremy** » 06 Aug 2005, 10:50

Give it gas - of the oxy acetylene type!
Having said that perhaps I'd do better with the oxygen!
Jeremy

wrinklet1 · Post by **wrinklet1** » 06 Aug 2005, 16:28

New Idea, Gas & Air, then a couple of ProPlus washed down with Red Bull. You will strip a Cx down in 2 hours then it may ware off and you can't put it back together again. 2 more ProPlus + Red Bull and hey presto you put it back together but you end up with a 2cv and a visa out of the parts!!!!
(nothing against 2cv's or Visa's)
Paul