Joke I found funny...

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Gibbo2286
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Re: Joke I found funny...

Post by Gibbo2286 »

mickthemaverick wrote: 19 Jul 2020, 11:01
crapday69 wrote: 19 Jul 2020, 00:41 I had sex in a lift. It was So wrong on many levels.
Interesting play with words here, I thought that should have read :

I had sex in a lift. It was wrong on So many levels! :?: :-D

And maybe 'We' instead of I..........................unless. :)
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Re: Joke I found funny...

Post by crapday69 »

Mick I teetered about with that no being sure what was right and what was wrong. Star Trek comes to mind with To boldly go, when it should have read to go boldly!!
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Re: Joke I found funny...

Post by crapday69 »

Ah but Gibbo if I said we then that would imply 2 people when in fact I was using a rubber doll lol 😂 😂 😝
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Re: Joke I found funny...

Post by oscar »

Police found a man unconscious in the road rushed to hospital on examining medics found 8 plastic horses up his butt!
When police arrived to Enquire on his condition the Hospital said hes...Stable
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Re: Joke I found funny...

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Re: Joke I found funny...

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"This guy is dining alone in a fancy restaurant and there’s a beautiful redhead sitting at the next table. He’s been sneakily checking her out ever since he arrived, but doesn’t have the courage to start talking to her.

Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket toward the man. His reflexes kick in and he reaches out, plucks it out of the air, and hands it back to her.

The redhead is mortified. “Oh my, I am so sorry,” she says as she pops her eye back into place. “Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you.”

So he joins her table and they enjoy a wonderful meal together. Afterwards, they go to the theatre followed by drinks at a bar. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens.

After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap. He says yes and they return to her place.

He ends up staying the night. The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed at how everything has been so perfect and how incredible this woman is. He can’t believe his luck. “You know,” he said, “you are the perfect woman, are you this nice to every guy you meet?”

“No,” she replies, “You just happened to catch my eye.”
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Re: Joke I found funny...

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Re: Joke I found funny...

Post by mickthemaverick »

The current discussion on the toolbag thread reminded me of the old joke:

Did you here about the constipated mathmatician?
















He worked it out with a pencil! :oops:
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Re: Joke I found funny...

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. . . But gave up, because he couldn't see the point.
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Re: Joke I found funny...

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Re: Joke I found funny...

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Re: Joke I found funny...

Post by mickthemaverick »

My girlfriend mixed up her KY Jelly with superglue. I asked her how she'd managed that but her lips were sealed!
I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure!
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Re: Joke I found funny...

Post by mickthemaverick »

My friend says to me: "What rhymes with orange" I said: "No it doesn't"
I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure!
I used to ride on two wheels, but now I need all four!