Davie's french attraction.

[Hell Razor5543]

I will always guarantee my work;

Spoiler: show

For up to 10 seconds after I have left site!

[CitroJim]

I will always guarantee my work;

Spoiler: show

For up to 10 seconds after I have left sire!

Oh damn! My warranty is void then. No wait a minute, if I look at the route finder on my AA atlas using a ruler Macduff and Little horwood is only about 12 inches apart so thats £202 of a claim. I think ill go to the county court. Ill use Aberdeenshire cos thats where I live lol

Ahh, bugger I never factored that in - there's always a loophole to exploit isn't there

I'll pay up this time... In Zimbabwean Dollars... 202 of them

[Hell Razor5543]

You know why it takes so long to properly train up engineers, don't you? The most important part of the training is the hammer selection tuition. It takes a lot of knowledge to know which hammer to use in each circumstance. It has to be big and heavy enough to knock sense into the recalcitrant object while not being so heavy as to knock the stuffing out of the sodding thing!

[CitroJim]

You know why it takes so long to properly train up engineers, don't you? The most important part of the training is the hammer selection tuition. It takes a lot of knowledge to know which hammer to use in each circumstance. It has to be big and heavy enough to knock sense into the recalcitrant object while not being so heavy as to knock the stuffing out of the sodding thing!

It's true! We used to say of our engineering grades...

Grade III knew that it needed to be hit with a hammer;
Grade II knew where to hit it and...
Grade I knew where to hit it and how hard...

[Michel]

The chap who trained me at Citroen back in the late 80s had a similar mantra.

"If it is jammed and won't move with normal methods, hit it with a big hammer. If it still doesn't work, hit it with a bigger hammer. If it breaks it was f***ed and needed replacing anyway".

[CitroJim]

The chap who trained me at Citroen back in the late 80s had a similar mantra.

"If it is jammed and won't move with normal methods, hit it with a big hammer. If it still doesn't work, hit it with a bigger hammer. If it breaks it was f***ed and needed replacing anyway".

Love it

[Stickyfinger]

The chap who trained me at Citroen back in the late 80s had a similar mantra.

"If it is jammed and won't move with normal methods, hit it with a big hammer. If it still doesn't work, hit it with a bigger hammer. If it breaks it was f***ed and needed replacing anyway".

Unless of course, you forgot about the hockey stick clamps...........

[CitroJim]

Unless of course, you forgot about the hockey stick clamps...........

Good point well made

[daviemck2006]

Well the cops are out to get my son and get him banned from driving. Rightly so too. And the sooner the better, it might learn him to behave in a car. After him getting nicked for no road tax on the mx5, no headlight and a broken back light on the 107, he got nicked tonight doing a doughnut with the mx5 in a public carpark, given an asbo and charged with reckless driving. And his car is confiscated. I had absolutely no sympathy for him when he told me. If he loses his licence he will find it incredibly difficult to get to his job due to remote location. It is all his own fault, no one else’s. The sooner he grows up the better.

[Michel]

Well the cops are out to get my son and get him banned from driving. Rightly so too. And the sooner the better, it might learn him to behave in a car. After him getting nicked for no road tax on the mx5, no headlight and a broken back light on the 107, he got nicked tonight doing a doughnut with the mx5 in a public carpark, given an asbo and charged with reckless driving. And his car is confiscated. I had absolutely no sympathy for him when he told me. If he loses his licence he will find it incredibly difficult to get to his job due to remote location. It is all his own fault, no one else’s. The sooner he grows up the better.

I'm sorry Davie, I disagree here. Sounds like your plod need some lessons in the relative seriousness of offences. All they're going to achieve is pissing off your son and his mates. That is *not* the way to effectively Police, and bloody hell, doing donuts is hardly the crime of the century*. A bollocking and a cool but severe warning should be enough. Asbo and reckless driving? Either he was doing worse than he told you or the coppers are gits.

* Doing Donuts in a car park is something every male (and many female) owners of MX5s under 30 years old has done...

[daviemck2006]

The plods here are dickheads. I was in Shauna 107 and triggered the warning sign coming into the town at 33, it lights up before you come into the 30 limit. A plod car was behind me which I knew, he followed me and when I stopped was going to do me for speeding. I argued with him, I can’t get done speeding for doing 33 in a 60. Same plod man tried to take me in the activa one night for coming out of a junction too fast. Again I argued him. It was in a 40 limit, no restricted visibility, nice night, no traffic apart from the plod car which did a rapid turn to come after me. And it was the same (-expletive removed-) that was going to book me for parking on a yellow line at midnight showing a blue badge. He got an official complaint about that one. I wouldn’t be surprised if it is the same (-expletive removed-). They aren’t doing themselves any favours, I agree with you there, but Shaun does need to watch his driving behaviour a bit.

[CitroJim]

I don't approve of your Plod's attitude at all Davie... Fact is, young drivers are an easy target for their stats - they don't have to work very hard to get a 'nick' and in safety too - no having to deal with hardened and violent crims who might fight back...

I therefore agree with you Mike but I also agree Shaun needs to be brought to heel, taught a lesson or three and learn a bit of responsibility; a good few bollockings will do the job and no need to get legally 'heavy'...

A temporary withdrawal of automotive privileges, but not a formal ban and all the consequences that would bring, might do him good. A few weeks of cycling to work in the winter might ram a few very important lessons home...

[daviemck2006]

There’s a big drug problem in this area just now, they don’t go chasing the drug dealers, and two of the three times they have stopped me I have been in the 107. I think they have cars on a hit list and they were surprised when a fat old man was driving it when they had a go. I said as much to the complaints inspector who I spoke to when I did complain, and he said he couldn’t comment on that, which to me means there is. Doing a donut in an empty car park at 10pm which has no residential properties within 1/4 of a mile from it is hardly a massive crime, and doesn’t deserve an asbo and a fine and points in my opinion either, I mean o have done wheelspins, handbrake turns etc in the same car park many moons ago, and been caught by plod doing it, the bollocking I got did stop me though. And the lights out a few weeks ago Shaun got was harsh also, who hasn’t driven with a bust light at some point, including cops on duty? But there still needs to be a method of my son getting more respect behind the wheel of a car, so if he gets a ban and that teaches him the lesson then so be it. I have tried hard enough, I ain’t trying any more with him on his driving issues. He is 23 now and needs to act responsibly.

[CitroJim]

Davie, agree with every word... They really do need to get on top of the drug problem as a first priority... Drugs are bloody evil. I could go on but I won't... You know my views on the subject...

I'm amazed they seem to target 107s - it's hardly a chav-mobile is it? Many older people drive them...

It's a good job I don't live there with my Saxo - I'd always be being pulled!!!

[Michel]

Davie, agree with every word... They really do need to get on top of the drug problem as a first priority... Drugs are bloody evil. I could go on but I won't... You know my views on the subject..

The way forward is decriminalization. People have taken drugs of one kind or another since the beginning of time, and will always do so. Make them clean, make them cheap, put in place proper programmes to help people get clean from class-A addictive substances and cut out the criminal middle men. It's the only way. Everything else has been tried. This approach is working slowly in Portugal.

Having Colombian family has made me very aware of the civil war and devastation that even producing cocaine causes. It's horrific and you'll be hard pushed to find *any* Colombian "normal" citizen there or here who would ever go near cocaine as a refined drug. They really do not like people talking about it even as a joke. My normally polite missus will happily give someone a rude telling-off if/when she gets the usual "oh, you're Colombian. We know where to get the coke later then" at a gathering..

The correct response from plod to Davie's lad's doughnut should have been "Oi. Mckay. P1ss off and don't let us catch you being such a tw@t again or we will throw the book at you. <throw in suggestion of where doing a donut might not be so annoying to locals>"...