Life on the edge - returning to the fold!!!

Tell us your ongoing tales and experiences with your French car here. Post pictures of your car here as well.

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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by Xantianut »

Hello, Friends.

Thank you for your messages of support. Papa did tell me it was not my fault at all but that of the heinous Bodger who owned me before. He was no papa. Proper Papas look after their little girls, pampering them and either taking them to a good hospital or mending them themselves. Papa is a good mechanic, listening, checking, isolating and then repairing. The filter bodge did get him though. He thought my crankshaft pulley was failing but it wasn't. It was glue from my filter housing, I did feel ill, ticking badly.

Papa likes the Valentas himself. They are noisy and I agree they make a good noise BUT aren't they smoky? I am a good clean girl, I do not like making vast clouds of black smoke. Or smoke of any other colour for that matter! I also liked the two Paxman Venturas in the Clayton for the sound, but the smoke!!!! The 40s sound great and do not smoke much, I would love to whistle like that at tick over then rumble at full power! Can we persuade Papa to fit three more turbos and 12 more cylinders?

Still no parcel with a fuel filter in it. There was a,parcel with some special pliers in it that Papa,showed me and they look rather well made. But no filter. It was supposed to be here today! How,can something be advertised as a 24 hour service but be delivered "Whenever?" This may mean I miss my monthly outing to Lichfield tomorrow. I like Lichfield, a good leg stretch on the dual carriageway where Papa enjoys my turbo then feet up with some interesting cars to chat to and a lovely view of the cathedral. Followed by another leg stretch home.

I think Papa's Hit List is getting longer!

Love

Otterchops.

:rant2:

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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by CitroJim »

Yes, Valentas do smoke a little but not on the scale that my very favourite diesel engine does... The Class 55 Deltic :D Seeing one of those running in a covered trainshed and it could be mistaken for a steam locomotive... Only the smell gives it away as a diesel...

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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by Xantianut »

Hello, Friends!

I am excited!

Papa has fitted my new fuel filter and I am running again! I am now fuel tight and safe. My Papa is a genius.

It does make me think though, now that Papa has found two rotten bodges what else awaits him? Could the nice people at Citroen fit a fool filter that allows us to electrify our stylish bodies at 25,000 volts whenever s Bodger approaches? Now that would be a useful superpower!

I am happy that I am in safe hands at last!

Otterchops

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Hell Razor5543
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by Hell Razor5543 »

Great news. Now watch the fuel economy improve. Papa (and that dreaded Yorkshire Wallet) will appreciate it.

Not sure about the fool filter though. How would you know if the person approaching was (or was not) a fool until they had actually done something (or that the bodge they had done was merely to get you to a place where a proper job could be done)?

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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by CitroJim »

That's great news Otterchops :D

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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by Xantianut »

Hell, Friends!

Tonight I find myself in Yorkshire. Papa is almost unintelligible, so Yorkshire has he become! But that's OK. I had a lovely run up the A38 and M1. Does a girl good to clear out her turbo every now and then! I will be taking my Auntie Colinne to Huddesfield Railway Station at silly o'clock tomorrow morning but that is no problem. I am plumping up my comfortable seats as I rest.

Papa,is,a happy man, some time ago, he thought he had lost his,Grandmother's wedding ring. This was made from a sovereign, in true Gypsy tradition, and was given to him by his mum (my late grandma) and has always been his most prized possession. Even more so than me, so he was very upset when he lost it. He found it in his medicine bag while looking for his insulin pen! It is once more on a chain around his neck. I like seeing Papa happy.

Going to get a couple,of,hours,kip now so talk soon, friends!

Otterchops,

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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by CitroJim »

Is auntie off to somewhere nice?

Excellent news on the wedding ring :D

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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by Xantianut »

Hello, friends,

Back home in Wolverhampton, after a swift and economical run south,

Oh, and, as always, Papa gets out of my driving seat relaxed. Except.....

He tried a new app, Driflo for his iPhone, it bleeps and burps plus makes my radio inaudible because it makes iPhone forever searching for the next cell. I thought Papa was going to,throw iPhone out of the window! It was quite an anchievement for him to wait until we got to Tibshelf services to remove the offending app from his phone. He was turning purple.....

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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by CitroJim »

What does Driflo do?

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Hell Razor5543
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by Hell Razor5543 »

CitroJim wrote:What does Driflo do?
Apart from wind people up, that is?

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daviemck2006
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by daviemck2006 »

Turns people purple! Otterchops described it quite adequately [emoji12] [emoji23]

Sent from my SM-G361F using Tapatalk

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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by CitroJim »

daviemck2006 wrote:Turns people purple! Otterchops described it quite adequately [emoji12] [emoji23]
:rofl2:

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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by Xantianut »

Hello, Friends!

Driflo is a,phone app that rates Papa's driving. It said he was a little aggressive in his cornering and braking but then why adopt a Citroen and not use my powerful brakes and superb cornering? He decided he could live with that. What he could not live with was his phone constantly seeking a new Internet connection! It does not affect my radio when it looks for a phone cell and I play music to calm Papa's frazzled nerves. However, remember the awful sound the car radio made when your mobile was searching for a cell to connect to? This was drowning out the Bellowhead Papa,wanted to listen to! And he always hated that sound, blue Fifi told me this on a regular basis but then her speakers were not hardened at all against cell signals, Mine are against the phone but not the stronger signals mobile internet requires!

He has deleted the app so sweetness and light ensures in my comfortable cabin. For the moment anyway.

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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by CitroJim »

Ahh, thanks Otterchops :D Pleased I now know what the Driflo app is all about... I think I'll pass on one of those!

The noise a phone makes into a wireless when sending data is possibly one of the very worst noises of all.. Horrid...

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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Post by Xantianut »

Hello, friends,

Papa has a question. When he bought my new locks, these came with an ECU that came odd a 2.0 HDi 8v. He is thinking this way. He like a single key for everything and he has the scratch card for the "new" ECU and keys. Can he fit this without any dramas? He would also like to use the plip buttons, he is worried that the BSI won't accept the new keys. Or that the BSI will not accept a new ECU. It's all so complicated!!!!!

Does my BSI hold my immobiliser code? Or is it my engine ECU? And where is the PLIP code? I think he is going to have to Spend Money.........

No point asking me, I just drive these things, I don't know how they work, any more than Papa does!