Life on the edge - the Diary of a C5

Tell us your ongoing tales and experiences with your French car here. Post pictures of your car here as well.
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Xantianut »

Hello friends!

I reckon he taught Arkwright's till all it knows! Fifi VI often told me how she could steal from his wallet but he's changed his wallet since then. This is the High Security Yorkshire Wallet that even breaks my fingers! So thinking about how to part him from some money.

Had my feet up since Christmas Eve. Papa says too many drunks on the roads and I agree with him!
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Xantianut »

My Papa is an idiot!

Not only has he broken one pair of glasses but then he has gone and LOST the others. So now he cannot drive me because he can't see properly.

[-X
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)
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CitroJim
A very naughty boy
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by CitroJim »

Xantianut wrote:My Papa is an idiot!

Not only has he broken one pair of glasses but then he has gone and LOST the others. So now he cannot drive me because he can't see properly.

[-X
Oh dear, that'll be hurting his wallet a bit when he goes to the optician... :twisted:

Still, on the bright side, it's giving you a longer rest and he's being sensibly careful not to expose you or anyone else on the roads to any danger....
Jim

Runner, cyclist, duathlete, Citroen AX fan and the CCC Citroenian 'From A to Z' Columnist...
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Xantianut »

Hello, friends!

I've done it! I've got Papa to spend money on me! He has bought me a new crank pulley and an electric impact driver to fit it. So waiting for the impact driver to arrive then he can get busy.

He has also got his old glasses reglazed and was attacked viciously by his Wallet for this. He is about to be attacked again when he collects the new pair. He is covered in bruises from the first attack still so what he'll be like when he collects the 2nd I dread to think.

Oh, hang on. Did the Wallet attack him for buying me things?

Good!
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)
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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by CitroJim »

No, he will never suffer a wallet attack for buying YOU stuff!
Jim

Runner, cyclist, duathlete, Citroen AX fan and the CCC Citroenian 'From A to Z' Columnist...
Hell Razor5543
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Hell Razor5543 »

Otterchops, you might want to point out to Daddy that (being an HDi powered C5) you are one of the more economical large cars on the road, and so you are saving him money when he is riding in comfort.
James
ex BX 1.9
ex Xantia 2.0HDi SX
ex Xantia 2.0HDi LX
ex C5 2.0HDi VTR
ex C5 2.0HDi VTR
ex C5 2.2HDi VTX+

Yes, I am paranoid, but am I paranoid ENOUGH?
Out amongst the stars, looking for a world of my own!
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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by CitroJim »

That's a very good point well made James :D
Jim

Runner, cyclist, duathlete, Citroen AX fan and the CCC Citroenian 'From A to Z' Columnist...
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Xantianut »

Hello friends!

Papa is very aware of my frugality with diesel and very happy that diesel is now so cheap!

His Wallet has other ideas. I hear screaming, the Wallet is attacking once more. I shall sit on it, should calm it a bit.

PAPA!!!! Put your Wallet under my big tires!
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)
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CitroJim
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by CitroJim »

Xantianut wrote: PAPA!!!! Put your Wallet under my big tires!
Good idea!
Jim

Runner, cyclist, duathlete, Citroen AX fan and the CCC Citroenian 'From A to Z' Columnist...
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Xantianut »

Hello, friends,

It seems to have worked, The Wallet screamed while under my big tyres but has been quiet since. I hope it stays like that, we are going to Yorkshire tomorrow and I do not want the Wallet chewing at my spacious and comfortable interior. Maybe Papa should do this regularly? I know the Wallet could chew my tyres but they are strong, go on, Papa, at least once a week,

Strange how the Wallet is scared of Maman,,,,,,,
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Xantianut »

Hello friends

I've had a busy few days. Daddy did his impression of a cruise missile by driving me at low altitude up to Yorkshire. I like scampering up the autoroutes*, it cleans my turbo nicely. Plus he gets super fuel economy which I will be able to show him just how good I am when he gets his finger out and fixes my Trip Computer!

I also got the money out of him for no reason! What he thought was a failing crank pulley has turned out to be a dribbling injector in No4 cylinder which, now he's bought the gear and investigated the pulley, I have fixed myself. Well, he should know by now, shouldn't he? All Citroens have a mind of their own! And a way of extracting money from his wallet!

Looking forward to Moseley Old Hall reopening this week. I have some nice car type friends over there.....

Love to all.

Otterchops.

Papa: they are motorways, Fifi.
Fifi: Whatever!!!
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5 not feeling very well!

Unread post by Xantianut »

Hello, friends.

Please save me from Papa's 4lb hammer!

He and Maman went out to a local pub yesterday and, when they came out, I was unable to start my powerful engine. Papa growled a bit then called our Green Flag who started me using a jump pack.

However, my glow plug light does not come on at all and it was -2 degrees so I may well need them, Once I was started, all was well but Papa and Maman had to wait for over an hour in the freezing cold! Please, how can he fix this without resorting to violence?

My starter turns over quickly and normally I start on the button. Please help!!!!!
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)
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myglaren
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by myglaren »

Glow plug light unlikely to show before -5°C.
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Xantianut »

It has always flashed on briefly before. She has done this twice before and the light stayed dark. When the light glows briefly, on the button,

Where's that hammer........
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)
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Xantianut
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Re: The diary of a C5

Unread post by Xantianut »

Interesting.

Normal operation of the glow plug light is restored, ie it flashes briefly before extinguishing. An she fired "On the button." So a Lexia session is indicated. Wish me luck.....

And me, says Otterchops.
C5 HDi 110 SX (Fifi 7 or Otterchops)

RIP
Citroen Xantia 1.8i LX (Fifi 6)
BX16TRS (x2) (Fifi 4 and 5)
BX19DTR (Fifi 2)
BX14E (x2) (Fifi 1 and 3)