Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by myglaren »

Not nesser celery!

"Please Mr. Bolt be kind and come loose with no further resistance" always works for me :rolleyes:









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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by Mandrake »

This forum is easily one of the friendliest that I've used, there are many forums where regulars pounce on "newbies" with venom if they ask any question that has been even remotely discussed before, or if the answer to the question seems too "obvious" to warrant an answer. This is especially the case on software related forums where RTFM is all that a newbie will get. (Read the F.....g manual) On some forums you'll get chastised if you don't introduce yourself in an introduction area of a forum before posting a technical question, as mentioned above...

Yes it can be frustrating sometimes when someone new posts a question that was just discussed 3 threads ago without any apparent attempt to use search, and its quite frustrating to provide advice and never hear back if you were right or not, but I've been on the receiving end of that on other forums where I've had an obscure problem that I just can't find the answer too, I've spent half an hour searching a forum and trolling through a dozen threads looking for a solution, can't find anything, post regarding it and promptly get flamed as the issue is a "known bug" or has "already been discussed" in some thread I couldn't find. Sometimes the egos of such people are unbearably large and that's the last time I ever bother with that forum...

While there are sometimes some lively, even heated differences of opinion here (and really not that often at all) I think its just that - differences of opinion and healthy debate, not malicious intent or big egos.

A large percentage of communication between people is non-verbal in nature, its not what we say but how we say it, body language, eye contact, and tone of voice. On a written forum like this all of those cues are stripped away leaving only the literal words. This makes it very easy to get the wrong impression about what someone says. When trying to "fill in the blanks" between the literal words its all too easy to assume a certain tone of voice is behind certain words when it may not be, thus take offence where none is intended this happens all the time on forums and far less here than elsewhere. Emoticons (smiley faces) help somewhat but are still open to interpretation and are too easy to misuse.

And no, I don't really think its an age thing either. Rudeness is part of someone's personality and doesn't usually change with age...

Cheers, Simon. (A still young ?? 37 :lol: )
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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by Northern_Mike »

Mandrake wrote:
While there are sometimes some lively, even heated differences of opinion here (
i would like to point out, for those that don't know me personally, that my grumpiness and/or argumentative style of posting (as in the oil thread where I was arguing with qprdude) is almost always tongue-in-cheek and never actually meant to be offensive! If I wanted to be offensive I would be (at least until the mods banned me!)
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Post by addo »

I am willing to take on the aggressor role, and give a hearty serve to every new member introducing themselves, without exception. Those who join but do not introduce themselves will be abused via PM, and the message posted in a dedicated thread.
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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by CitroJim »

Northern_Mike wrote:
Mandrake wrote:
While there are sometimes some lively, even heated differences of opinion here (
i would like to point out, for those that don't know me personally, that my grumpiness and/or argumentative style of posting (as in the oil thread where I was arguing with qprdude) is almost always tongue-in-cheek and never actually meant to be offensive! If I wanted to be offensive I would be (at least until the mods banned me!)
I can vouch for that :)
addo wrote:I am willing to take on the aggressor role, and give a hearty serve to every new member introducing themselves, without exception. Those who join but do not introduce themselves will be abused via PM, and the message posted in a dedicated thread.
:lol: :lol: :lol:



And I'm 53...
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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by spider »

I've not read the whole topic yet only the first couple of posts but its not uncommon to not get a "thanks!" answer. I spend a lot of time on other tech support forums and its about 50/50 if the OP will respond to say its OK or not, usually a response means more information / questions rather than "its fixed"

We actually have (not here obviously!) an "answered" button for the OP to mark it but again its only 50/50 on them using it, so thought I wanted to make it is not limited here by any means with regard to no response.
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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by beko1987 »

I'm a newbie, but try not to become part of the problem. It's basic politeness, wether through a keyboard or face-to-face

From another perspective, I stalk forums whenever I buy something (mainly car related), and the amount of posts where members have offered advice, but have had no follow-up to confirm wether it worked or not gets annoying.

If I ever ask a question, I round it off in some wat, either by saying it worked or it didn't, and more often than not providing a nice long post detailing how I did something based on the advice given, making sure to say thanks to the poster who gave me the advice in the first place.

On the other hand, some forums can be ignorant. I did an exhaust change on my girlfriends meriva, and dida how-to for a new-ish Meriva forum, and in the few weeks after, I got one or two murmors of 'thanks for going to the effort to get pics, and describe how you did it'. In that time, at least 30 new posts turned up with one line demands for answers, which all either fell off the first page or got answered with no further communication from the OP.

It's basic rudeness! Now excuse me, I need to go and get a cup of tea now! :evil:
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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by JohnD »

It happens on all forums that some members post their question then never acknowledge the help received. But what amazes me even more is when a new member joins a forum, asks for advice, then after several members have given their opinion, the new member never returns to the forum to read the replies.
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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by spider »

True.

Both here and the tech forum I work with, I sometimes wonder if the "no reply" means they have not read the reply or if it worked. To me its the not knowing sometimes, although good manners and a quick "thanks!" do not cost anything either. :)
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Re: Is it just me....or is it rudeness?

Post by qprdude »

Beko, John and spider just about sum up my feelings perfectly.
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